1. |
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|
How I knew
far before you knew yourself:
Honey, I counted up the time.
Step by step,
walking backwards towards the door,
thinking I finally crossed.
And now I
know the thin line.
I would give you my whole body if I could.
This is how
we do tend to fall apart.
Keep an eye out from time to time.
How is it
you so quickly say goodbye,
when you know
you’re clawing at the ceiling,
hardly breathing.
I would give you my whole body
if I thought that it would be the thing
that let you be
something outside yourself.
I don’t wanna walk away,
believe me.
Folded hands.
Thinking I know you now.
I don’t wanna walk away,
but I don’t wanna stay
the same.
Don’t you wanna know
if you ever know anyone?
Clawing at the feeling again
I would give you my whole body if I
thought that it would be the thing
that you let be
something outside yourself
I don’t wanna walk away,
believe me.
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2. |
|
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|
I don’t think you meant
to let it get this far.
Spinning landscapes
from a moving car—
blurred to nothing.
Earth tone mud shit.
Smashed together
into nothing I recognize.
I know I never meant
to let it get this far.
Standing sideways
at the dumb boy bar.
Held together.
Too-small sweater.
Drinking fourteen dollar takes
on what I’ve got at home.
When am I gonna see you again, love?
I’ve been asking myself where you’ve gone.
I know we never meant
to let it get this far.
You’d throw ice cream pints
like a football star.
When I first met you.
Somehow we both knew.
Now we’re standing in the street
and screaming “you won’t change.”
When am I gonna see you again, love?
I’ve been asking myself where you’ve gone.
There’s a shadow growing longer where you stand in the sun.
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3. |
|
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|
Darling, I lost the feeling again.
The rosary, the too-still hands.
Misplaced, or never found.
What if I just never look down?
Hard to believe
things tend to turn out right.
Folding up the clothes again.
A functioning, good member of the Earth.
But still I stand divided—
half of me has never been here.
Man I believe
things tend to turn out.
Impatient me,
always looking to the end
of all long lines
as if the meaning
don’t change in time—
like tomorrow’s gonna have
my gods.
|
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4. |
Runner
03:35
|
|
||
|
“I could never just run off”—
I believe it when I say it.
And then I’m gassing up the car.
See you in the calling cards and then I stop.
Never believe me when I say it.
It was red and white when I looked up—
I was staring out at the sun.
But I figured out
if I just look down,
walk around,
then I can shake the feeling—
see you in the light again.
I wanna see you in the light.
“I could never break your heart”—
I can hear myself say it.
And then I’m pulling you apart.
I’m a runner ‘cause it hurts.
I’m a runner, always at the line.
But I can’t say why.
It was red and white when I looked up—
I was staring out at the sun.
But I figured out
if I just look down,
walk around,
then I can shake the feeling—
see you in the light again.
|
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5. |
Fend
03:57
|
|
||
|
Whenever I fault the Earth,
I’m never far behind.
Reading into the signs some hell.
Standing in fading light, it starts again.
When the night comes in,
you want me around.
It’s you I know.
It’s you I want.
It’s all we have
to fend the darkness off.
Whatever the science is
behind you taking on
the pains of the world—
I don’t wanna dull it off
but at the end,
I wanna be sure
we let some light in.
It’s you I know.
It’s you I want.
It’s all we have
to fend the darkness off.
Calling it fine
is no place of mine.
But whether we still get up
I wanna be certain of.
It’s you I know.
It’s you I want.
It’s all we have
to fend the darkness off.
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6. |
Sundowning
05:14
|
|
||
|
Coming on slow,
it’s the evening and I’m lost.
Hadn’t seen the sun
til it was too far gone.
Til it was sinking in its colors.
Now it’s pulling me down.
So I learn my place:
On a planet that gives you daylight,
who am I to be so cold?
Believe you me,
I would shake it if I could.
I’d pack our bags
and head into the woods.
I would rest in piny clearings.
I’d give everything back.
Remembering, I know—
that everything I borrow
is everything I owe.
(Lights out and saying farewell again.)
Coming on quick,
it’s the end that’s never made sense.
How the walls fall away
and the rest is nothing.
At the bottom of the ocean,
there’s a layer that’s never moved.
It’s only right you told me that,
because I can’t even fathom.
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7. |
In Two
04:08
|
|
||
|
You knew me when I was
a wait-around-and-see
a sucker and a thief,
a show-it-all.
Tied to the feeling of
a pattern in the sky,
Washed out by the lights—
I couldn’t tell, I couldn’t.
Well even if I cut it,
or half it down to size,
I might still let it take my mind.
Seven sisters in the night
constellating high.
I’m two steps to the right,
and a million stories down.
Well even if I cut it,
Or half it down to size,
I might still let it take my mind.
I know
this is how it ends:
I walk away
and turn around.
If I had
all of it again,
I’d break it all in two.
|
||||
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